Accepting Our Fate
by HopelessRomantic972
Summary: How would the lives of the employees of Seattle Grace Hospital be changed if Prom (2x27) ended a little differently? A look at life though the seasons for everyone in the interns unexpected family. How the latter seasons would have progressed if the MAGIC still existed. MerDer mostly but everyone has their story told eventually.
1. Prom Night

Meredith had been standing there between the two men, her boyfriend and the man she loved who she had just had sex with in an exam room. Finn offered to take her home and with one last long look at Derek she took his hand and left with him, leaving Derek with only his intense gaze and his wife. Down the stairs they walked in silence getting into one of the many cabs outside that had been booked to shuttle the prom goers home safely. She vaguely heard Finn telling the cab driver the address of her house, so that she could get home to be with Izzie she supposed, it was all background noise to her as her mind spun.

It only took her a few minutes to realise that she was an idiot. She was in a cab with the most wonderful man, he was lovely and everything every happily-ever-after girl dreamed to find and yet here she was with him and all his plans for the future and she was feeling like her world was ending just a little bit more with every meter the cab drove onwards. Her heart wasn't broken. She was sure it wasn't even in her chest anymore; it had been left at the hospital. It had been left with him. If this was how the future was going to be, going to feel, could it ever be right? Could anyone else lay claim to her stolen heart? More importantly could Finn?

A whispered, "No" escaped her lips and slow tears began to make tracks down her face as she realised that she would never love Finn, not in that really big pretend to like his taste in music, let him eat the last piece of cheesecake, hold a radio over her head outside his window, unfortunate movie-esk way. She would of course have let Finn eat the last of the cheesecake or lie to him about his taste in music but purely to be polite, never because she loved him so completely that it didn't even bother her like with Derek.

"Stop the cab!" She shouted suddenly, sitting bolt upright she turned to Finn as the driver slowed the vehicle and pulled over to the side of the road. "I'm sorry Finn, I can't do this. You're the fairytale guy. You're perfect, and every girl would die to have you…except me. I'm not the happily-ever-after girl. I'm hopelessly in love with the one man in the world I can't have. You deserve to have someone who's so hopelessly in love with you that they feel like they've lost their heart each time you leave the room, so in love that it's painful. I'm sorry Finn but you'd just be wasting your time with me because while we may build a life together you would never truly get what you deserve, not from me anyway." She whispered one last, "sorry", and with that she tuned and got out of the cab, shutting the door behind her.

Running down the road back towards the hospital as fast as she could in heals whilst hoisting up her dress so that she didn't catch it and fall, she wondered what in the hell she was doing. She was Meredith if something this life-changing happened then she went home and waited for the guy to catch up with her, she didn't run down roads and through hospital parking lots to try and get to the guy before he left with his wife. His wife. "What the freaking hell am I doing?" she said aloud hoping to gain some clarity from the voiced question. She didn't know, it was something in the way he was looking at her before she left. She couldn't quite place it, it was like he was offering her everything, a future if only she chose to stay, chose him. All she knew was that she had to get to him as quickly as possible.

* * *

Derek collapsed dejectedly on to his elbows, giving up on life completely and wondering where it had all gone wrong. How had he lost her so completely? He realised choosing Addison and then staying with her for months, whilst trying to ignore his feelings for Meredith probably wasn't a particularly encouraging sign of his love for her. But for her to turn away from him and leave with the vet was another thing entirely. It was clear that she still felt something for him, they had just had the most passionate sex he had ever had but she didn't even want to discuss whether they had any future, she just left with him.

He stood on the centre of the second floor walkway across the front of the hospital, staring out of the glass wall across the parking lot and towards the lights of Seattle. The hospital was quiet for once, peaceful, and this particular part was a very good spot for thinking. Everyone was either still at the prom or on their way home like his wife. After Meredith had left she had suggested that they leave and head home but Derek had finally had enough of pretending that everything was fine, that they were happy. He had told her that it was over, they had fought about it but in the end she knew it was coming, so agreed fairly easily when he told her he'd sleep at a hotel and pick up some stuff tomorrow. They had been clinging hopelessly to a spark that had blown out years ago, to an idea that a marriage certificate can make everything right. It had been over so long ago that he couldn't truly pinpoint when it was that the love died and the hope left the building never to return. That should have been it, right back then, whilst they were still in New York. They had been 'flogging a dead donkey', as his mother would have said, for far too long. This was good, even if Meredith didn't want him, he couldn't continue to live a lie for a second longer.

Staring out of the big window into the parking lot he noticed something that instantly caught his attention. There was a running figure, a woman by the looks of things, as she got closer he could see her more clearly. She had long dark blonde hair and was wearing a floor length black dress, his heart jumped and he was sure he was imagining it, it couldn't be. It was her, it was Meredith. Without thinking he turned and hurried along the walkway to the elevators, stabbing the down button, and impatiently tapping his foot as he watched the numbers count upwards until the doors finally opened. In he hurried pressing for the ground floor, wishing for the elevator to go faster, he'd curse him-self if he missed her.

* * *

Out of breath she burst through the hospital doors, passing a few people clearly leaving the prom all in formal attire looking bewilderedly at her, she didn't notice who they were didn't even to listen for any of them saying her name, she had one thing on her mind, a single goal, all she could think was of him and where he might be. She ran for the elevators, not sure where she was going but knowing that it was more likely that he'd be somewhere on the surgical floor than down here.

She pressed the button to go upwards and waited, regaining her breath, for the doors to open. When they did she couldn't believe her eyes. She watched them slowly pull apart to reveal a slightly frantic looking Derek looking straight at her, a huge smile growing on his face as he took in the fact that she was standing right in front of him. She didn't know how it had happened, how he had been exactly where she had wanted him, how he looked so pleased to see her, even though she must look pretty terrible after all the running. She knew she was red in the face and that her hair was a mess but she didn't care, cause he was looking at her again, he was looking at her in that way.

She stepped into the otherwise empty elevator not wanting to have this conversation in the middle of the foyer. "Derek…" she breathed, unable to say anything else.

"Meredith." He grinned, and moved towards her in the small space. "You came back."

"I…I did." She stumbled along with her thoughts, how did she tell him she wanted to be his everything, when she knew that she could never be. He was married. She had just become his mistress and lost any of the respect she had once had. How did she tell him she loved him and wanted to be the one for him without being a home-wrecker? "I'm not really sure what I'm doing, 'cause nothing has freaking changed, you're still married and I'm still a dirty mistress and you still chose her but I'm here. I broke up with Finn and I came back. I came back to tell you I loved you, I really freaking love you, like I'd give you the whole cheesecake kinda love. But now I don't know why I'm here 'cause nothing has changed…" She rambled quietly, more to herself than to him.

"Meredith…Mer." He said trying to bring her thoughts back to the present. "Everything has changed. Absolutely everything." He moved towards her taking her hands in his. "I ended it with Addison. I'm done pretending, there was no way to save it, I realise now that we were over years ago, ages before I ever even met you. You're not a dirty mistress; you're the woman that I've been madly in love with for months. And that is actually one of the things I regret the most about this whole mess, that I didn't tell you I loved you before, on the day I met you even because I'm pretty sure I felt it then. I've loved you every day since we met Meredith Grey, and I will love you forevermore I'm sure of that. You are amazing and I'm so sorry, so freaking sorry, I hope that someday you can forgive me for being such a fool."

She giggled at his apology and he lifted one eyebrow as if to ask why, "I'm sorry", she muttered though the giggles, "but it's just that you said 'freaking', clearly I'm a bad influence."

He chuckled along with her, it had been so long since they had been able to be happy together, but he had to know, "Is there any way you can ever forgive me and give me another chance?"

She smiled up at him taking her time to remember this moment. She was finally getting everything she had wanted for so long. "My heart has always belonged to you, but the trouble is that you've never kept it very safe. Maybe that's something you can work on 'cause I can't see it giving up on you anytime soon." And with that she kissed him right there in the middle of the elevator.

* * *

**AN: So what did you think? I would like to hear, I started writing this story years ago, when season 3 was actually airing probably, and have since been adding bits and pieces of scenes to it. I figured it was probably time to let someone else see it. **

**The title is subject to change as I have only just thought it up to publish it, I've always know it as 'Untitled MerDer FF' but that didn't seem all too enticing, so any suggestions as to a better title or does this fit? I wanted something that encompassed that feeling of 'it's about life and everything that happens along the way' in a few words that weren't too cheesey. The other title I had was 'Dust to Dust' as in everything that happens between birth and death but it seemed to depressing and this isn't a depressing story really.**

**I'm pretty nervous about sharing this; my stomach feels all strange and swirly. Butterflies I think. Not sure why though as I'm sure no one will read this anyway. But if you do I would like to know what you think even if you just review the word 'rubbish' at least I'll know not to waste my time on this anymore.**

**I really hope you don't think it's rubbish!**


	2. So What Now?

_She smiled up at him taking her time to remember this moment. She was finally getting everything she had wanted for so long. "My heart has always belonged to you, but the trouble is that you've never kept it very safe. Maybe that's something you can work on 'cause I can't see it giving up on you anytime soon." And with that she kissed him right there in the middle of the elevator._

* * *

"So what now?" She asked him once they broke from their embrace.

"What do you mean?"

"Well there's so much that needs to be said, so much to work out. This is good. This is what I've hoped and dreamed about for months, but now we're here, now that it's happened I don't know what to do."

"If I had my way I'd take you home right now and never let you go ever again. But I know that we need to sort this out properly first. Even though we haven't been together, so much has happened between us, so much has changed. I think you've seen a lot of my worst side recently and I know that my behaviour has hurt you. As much as we would like to we can't just jump right back in where we were before it wouldn't be the same."

"So where is this going Der? Are we getting back together? Are we back together? I'm a bit lost." She asked with uncertainty. While everything that had happened since she returned to the hospital suggested that they were heading in that direction she wasn't quite sure where they were in the process. And he was right, so much had changed between them. She used to trust him effortlessly, now there was a little bit of doubt that edged the words he said, like a crust they were that little bit harder to digest and to believe. He was saying everything she wanted to hear – him and Addison were over for good this time, it wasn't her fault, he loved her – it all felt perfect, but was it true. It shocked her how much her subconscious view of him had altered in their time apart. She was only now realising how heavily handicapped a new relationship between the two of them would be. There was so much ground they would have to make up just to get back to where they had started.

Derek considered her question, "I'd very much like to be back together, but you're in control here, what we are is really up to you Mer. What do you want?"

She knew that now she had him back she couldn't let him disappear again. But was she ready to invite him back to hers and jump back in as if nothing had happened between them. Her friends would never let her live it down if she arrived home with him and acted like nothing had ever happened, but it wasn't their life so what they thought didn't really matter at the end of the day if it was what she wanted and would make her happy; But was it? If she couldn't completely trust him right now could she imagine a time when she would be able to again? He needed to prove some things to her. He wasn't just being forgiven for everything he'd put her through, he needed to know that. "Okay." She quietly said out-loud as she tried to think of a way to express all that she was feeling without it all rushing out in an un-intelligible ramble. "I want us to be together again." She started of slow and a little hesitant, but watching the grin appear and slowly grow on his face spurred her onwards. "But I don't think we are there yet." His smile faltered. "We're on our way to being together. And I'd like it to just be us from now on, no being with anyone else." His face was growing more and more confused as she went on. _'Maybe I'm not explaining this very well' _she thought. She sighed, "How can I say this in a way that it makes sense." She paused, "Everything we had, it got ruined. And a fair amount of that was your fault. I'm not saying it all was, because some of it was definitely me. But while I'm still in love with you Derek, the you I know in my head now is so different from the Derek I loved back then. And I can't say I like the Derek I've seen recently all that much. You're still you, I know that. But you hurt me so much and coming back and saying all these amazing things that I want to hear doesn't automatically make it all okay. I know that it is all in the past but it's not been laid to rest yet. It doesn't work like that, as much as we may want it to, I've got to reconcile these two Dereks. You got to help me see that all those things I loved about you are still there and they are what I would be living with day in day out. You forced so much doubt in my mind about everything we were and who you were that I need to work through it and learn to trust you again, trust that you are the person I hope you are. Do you understand what I'm trying to say?"

"I think so. I know I've got a lot to make up for and there are amends to be made. I didn't expect everything to revert straight back to the old normal. Although I can't say I don't really wish it would. The bit I'm still unsure over is what we are at the moment?"

"I guess for now we are…dating. I've never really dated before but this seems like the right time for starting."

Starting to smile again Derek said, "Okay. Dating. I can do dating. This is a good thing. We need to start again and get to know each other again, so dating is perfect. I think you'll like dating Mer. It's very normal, which is something we have never been but is a good direction to start anew. So what does this dating entail? Like what are its limits?"

"I don't know. I've just told you I've never dated before, how am I supposed to know what you do when you're dating."

"Right, well how about this? We take it slow, with real dates with activities and outings and lots of talking. We've always been rubbish at communication so maybe we should try and work on that to start with. No sex." When she raised an eyebrow at this he chuckled and continued, "I can't believe that as soon as I get you back and all I want to do is ravish you the first thing I do is impose an embargo on sex, I think I need a neuro consult" he said more to himself than to her but it made her smile along with him anyway. "But seriously, we tend to bury our problems with great sex; I think that until we've worked them out we can't do it."

"At this rate we may never have sex again." She genially suggested implying that their problems were never ending.

"Fine how about no sex until it feels right again, until it feels like we're back on an even keel?"

"Okay I think I can live with that. So is that it?"

"Yeah. If there are other things we need to work out we can do that another time."

"So what happens now?"

"Well it's pretty late, so I guess we should go on home. I'll drive you. I expect you want to go and check on Izzie anyway. We can talk more extensively tomorrow."

"Oh Crap Iz! I'd completely forgotten about Izzie!" she exclaimed, "I'm such a rubbish friend. I got so self-involved with our stuff it flew out of my mind. Damn. Can we go? I've got to go and see what's going on. I'm sure I've already been missed and I don't want anyone to worry about me when they should be focusing on her." Already turning and making her way to exit the hospital.

Derek quickly followed her progress. This felt good, it felt normal. There was nothing she had said that he didn't agree with. It was hard for him to see the realities of how his actions had affected their relationship, but it was great that she was even giving him a chance to recover what they'd lost. He felt hopeful and more content than he had done since Addie had turned up in Seattle.

They headed down stairs, got into his car and set a course for her house. They were quiet during the drive, it was a comfortable quiet. Neither really knew what to say. It seemed the wrong time for chit-chat or gossip, and both of them avoided the Izzie situation – they'd be living it soon enough, they didn't need to hasten that hell by speculating before then knew what was going on in her home. When he pulled into her driveway and shut off the car, he turned in his seat to look at her. He still had trouble believing that they were both here, that this was really happening. A small smile graced his face and he leaned over and kissed her gently on her pert little lips, not going any further, it was enough for him for now that he was even allowed this pleasure.

Meredith voiced her internal wonderings, "So you said earlier that we'd talk tomorrow. Do you have the day off?"

"Yeah I do. I was planning on going in but only because I had nowhere else to go. Now I'd rather spend my day with you, if I can that is?" He turned his statement into a sheepish question realising she hadn't actually proposed anything yet.

"I have the day off too. But I don't really know how free I'll be until I go inside I guess. Maybe you could come by sometime after lunch and if I have time we can talk. Is that okay?"

"That sounds perfect. No pressure. I'll see you then. Good night Meredith." He leaned over and gave her one more light kiss. "This morning I never would have pictured that I would be ending my day like this. It's amazing. I'm exclusively dating Meredith Grey. I can't believe it's real." He sounded awestruck.

"Good night Derek." Meredith whispered as she got out of the car quietly content with her life for the first time in what felt like ages.

"Tell Izzie I'm sorry. It's terrible to lose someone you love." He knew from experience how hard it was.

"I will. Bye." With that she walked away and into her house. She was exhausted; it had been such a long day. So much had happened and it wasn't over yet.

* * *

**AN: Hey guys! Wow. I got 594 views for the first chapter! It's a little scary and breathtaking looking at the story stats, so many people from so many different countries that I could never have dreamed of reaching have read this story. I do hope you enjoyed the start of this fic, the eleven people who reviewed it seemed to. **

**Ozmerder4eva was the only person to answer my query about the title, so they're gonna get their way and I'll be keeping this title. I like it more now; it's definitely grown on me.**

**When I said before that I had loads of this fic written up already I wasn't lying, however in what I have there is this large season length gap after the first chapter. So I am sorry for the delay but I was stuck with the start and I knew where I want to go eventually with this but I just couldn't work out how to get there.**

**Please tell me what you're thinking, apparently you didn't think it was entirely rubbish. I'm very flexible so if there's anything you'd like to see happen, come suggest it. I'm still in the early stages of learning about who I am as a writer, praise is lovely but criticism is instructive, so don't be shy to tell me what you really think.**


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